Published on Nov 22, 2016
Busy, busy, busy that was Debbie Hayes until a chance accident gave her the perfect opportunity to pause and reflect. In this talk Debbie explores our modern world where technological transactions and the need for instant gratification are replacing even our most fundamental values and connections. But is it possible to achieve a balance of success without sacrifice and what are the costs?
Debbie Hayes has enjoyed a diverse career background including water engineering, brick manufacturing and telecommunications. A proud single mother and chocoholic Debbie is now a self-employed business coach with a mission to help large organisations, small business owners and individuals achieve success without sacrifice.
In the wake of her accident and using her own philosophies on work life balance Debbie created her own business with the emphasis on being able to spend more time with her son.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at http://ted.com/tedx
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Steve Jacob7 months ago
A really useful reminder that we all should take time to stop and think. This gives us more opportunity to run our lives proactive rather than reactive manner, and make better connections with others as well.
I do like ice cream and popcorn, but I certainly have a different view about both now!
Wonderful talk, Debbie, well done!
Debbie Hayes7 months ago
Thank you for your comments Steve. There is so much value to be gained from taking time out to stop and think and take proactive actions, aligned with what we really want.
It's funny how my stories referencing popcorn and the icecream stick in people's mind. Hopefully they will act as reminders of my talk and act as a prompt to step back and reconnect.
Marten Dekker4 days ago (edited)
Debbie Hayes : Teaching thru stories had been used for thousands & thousands of years, BECAUSE we remember best thru stories. This is because a story is a timeline & a web with many connections . The web & connections make it easily findable thru several points / references, ( informational & EMOTIONAL ones ) versus trying to find a memory in our brain with only one fact with no links to search for.
My excelling self defense instructor, when teaching his starting weekend course, spends more time on stories than drills. This gives people the biggest improvement in real world skill & execution, that's possible in 2 days. Because we remember stories.
You are also using unique / unusual visuals & metaphors...to create ideas & memories that stick & are easily recallable. ( book: Super Learning by a Bulgarian scientist / psychotherapist, Georgi Lozanov, has valuable techniques to increase the amount & longterm retention of presentations )( I'm familiar with his work, haven't looked at the newer " Super Learning 2000" book by different authors. ) That's very effective & smart of you. You're AWESOME. You are doing really important work. & looking beautiful doing it. ( not necessary... still, cool.) 👍
Comma Sense Limited
Comma Sense Limited8 months ago
Well done on such a fantastic talk. Your words really resonated with me Debbie. We are rapidly losing the art of conversation to phones, tablets and other devices. We need to stop, think, put our devices and other distractions to one side, and spend quality time with those who are important to us.
Debbie Hayes8 months ago
Thank you, great to hear it resonated with you. I hope you find it makes a difference to you as you implement this perspective.
Maggie Hollinshead8 months ago
Superb talk Debbie, a really powerful message and one I whole heartedly share. As you say technology and social media play a very important and useful part in our modern lives, but this really should not be at the cost of real social interaction, family values and the very personal skills that enable us to connect with each other. I will be recommending your talk to others, well done x
Debbie Hayes8 months ago
That is wonderful to hear Maggie, thank you. There is so much to gain if we can let go of the need to be busy and nurture the connections we have. Sadly many people don't believe it's even possible, but I've seen such transformations in my clients when they adopted my time management ethos and techniques. The benefit isn't just seen at work, a whole ripple effect cascades into their family, teams and the increased sense of self confidence, happiness and fulfillment is so wonderful to see.
Ze Bunker1 hour ago
Dress is way too small for that size of girl.
K Bhogal1 day ago
Bad dress choice!!! Very distracting. Please buy a mirror and clothes that flatter your body. This dress shows every lump and bump.
Schahrzad Morgan1 day ago
You're confidence and professionalism mixed with sexiness is a great inspiration. I love your boldness in wearing such a flattering dress. Often I judge women I see, but in your case I just marveled at your beauty, and I'm a straight woman. Super hot!! I like the concept of mixing hot with brains.
Dr John Pollard
Dr John Pollard4 days ago
Where is that accent from. I hear a hint of Aussie, but I'm guessing maybe NZ/UK as well.
cyc7lops5 days ago
The speaker confirms what I've always believed: that working fewer hours with more time to spend on self (sleep, exercise, hobbies/interests), home (homemaking and all that that entails to have a clean, organized, well-run home with time to plan, shop for, and prepare nutritious meals), and others (children, spouse, friends, community) improves the physical and mental health and quality of life for all involved. The speaker's solution was to set up her own business with reduced work hours. Great for her and a lucky few! But that's not a realistic option for most people with a mortgage or rent, car payment, mandatory skyrocketing health insurance premiums (with no cost controls in the US), etc. Most people need a steady job with benefits, not a precarious situation with unpredictable income and a high failure rate. Unfortunately, if you do the math, with expected work hours in the U.S. of even 40 hrs/week, let alone the 50-60+ expected of professionals, it's simply impossible to accomplish this blissful balance. The answer is shorter standard workweeks of 30 hours or less. With automation expected to cause mass unemployment worldwide within the decade, this is an ideal time for all countries to have conversations around guaranteed minimum incomes, 30 hour or less workweeks WITHOUT reduction in salaries, and single payer universal healthcare that includes financial protection for all citizens as well as dental, vision, hearing, podiatric care, etc. (all the things that the elderly and everyone else needs but that cruelly aren't included in the US Medicare system). I'm glad for the speaker, but becoming an entrepreneur is not a viable solution for most. Many of the Ted Talk speakers on various subjects propose entrepreneurialism as "the solution," and it's just not a realistic option for most. The majority of people have no desire to pay the cost of being too busy -- we know the terrible toll that it takes -- but that's the price that employers demand in exchange for employment. In the US you really have only two choices: massive amounts of uncompensated overtime (for salaried professionals), or unemployment. That's it. You're no longer going to accept it? The door is that way...
Bojan Kotur6 days ago
I'm addicted to checking my mobile phone.
nw80001 week ago (edited)
How did you find a business to do? Where did you get advice on what kind of business to start without killing oneself?
contrafax1 week ago
Excuse me? How many likes I get is much more important than feeding my kids or spending time with my wife.
Joelleen Beanks1 week ago
I am a biologician. Nope this doesnt work
Stitchscape9 months ago
Fabulous talk Debbie. It rings so true with my beliefs. Infact my own business is focused on trying to give like minded people a proper space to meet and connect with others, so that they feel that sense of belonging. People inspiring others is so key to that connection value. Success without sacrifice whilst making valuable connections is powerful and not 'just' a talk. It's a way of life we should definitely aspire to. Thanks.
Debbie Hayes9 months ago
Thank you for your fabulous comments. It's great to hear that you have focussed your own business in this way.
Success without sacrifice is indeed possible and a prinicple I hope to share far and wide to allow us all to leave a new landscape for the next generation.